Forgiveness in the age of Betrayal

If there is a way to make a bad situation worse, it is to have a bad attitude about it. 

Against Bitterness

I used to have an attitude of "Why do I keep doing this?" "I dislike myself for doing this", and so on. When repeated failure is not handled, and the one common factor is you, bad things can tend to happen. While it may be cathartic for a short period, it sets a bad example in the long-term. You grow to expect the worst for yourself, to expect you alone will guarantee the powerlessness of your best desires. The only response is never useful, only more and more poisonous feeling poured on it. Ultimately, one ends up becoming a shell of a man, using all of his energy to wail and moan of the past's tragedies (assuming they are; in my case, it looks doubly ridiculous considering I'm 19), blind to the obvious answer and yet addicted to his short-term relief despite what harm it does him. (And the short-term relief is no greater evil in self-improvement!)

And what are they?

As Koans:

• Complaints complaints complaints. So what can you do about it? 
• Yesterday doesn't exist, today is normal and tomorrow is improving.

More generally, you want to get the following things to be known with no reservation:

• The past cannot be changed.
• The present can be changed. 
• The future is according to the actions we do in the present.
• Regretting the past, thus, is harmful to the future, and has no benefit to an unchangeable past.
• Additionally: Regret, resentment, and bitterness, are harmful to the soul. They are a ruinous expense to accomplish nothing.

Thus: Any actions that are bad in the past, should be responded to with action, or simply ignored if they are not worth changing.

Check the brain (Desire: Control) when it demands too much, and when betrayal does less to show you have performed poorly, than that the brain itself is highly unreasonable.